i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
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