Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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