Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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