Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
God I need to hump something, right now.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
