Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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