he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize