what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Randomize
