You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
