mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize