Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
