What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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