You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
