North Korea, Best Korea!
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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