Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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