Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
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