How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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