You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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