Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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