gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
