Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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