do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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