if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i permit you to call me
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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