It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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