the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Randomize
