My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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