She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize
