its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize
