when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
