just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
did you just send me my own nude
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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