I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
