New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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