have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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