oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
