And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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