i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Your tits are I can't wait for
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
