Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I showed him my bush... on skype.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
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