i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
