Where did you get a picture of my penis
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
