Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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