I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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