My Higher Power is John Stamos
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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