Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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