Whoa Z and x make the same sound
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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