I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
