i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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