No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
