Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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