Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
