i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
