cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
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