matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize